Advent Blog Part 2: Standing By

If you missed part 1 of this series, please start here

By Pastor Emily Carroll

TW: Sexual violence

Matthew 1:20-21

But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you (genealogy reference) are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.”

Luke 1:34-35

Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I am a virgin?”

The angel said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be holy; he will be called Son of God.”

I visited Rome during a comparative religions class in my undergraduate studies. We walked through church after church and witnessed the decades of history and theology literally built on top of one another. One thing I noticed repeatedly was the veneration of Mary and her depiction in artwork as angelic almost: pure, white, beautiful skin, young, with a halo of light around her. It seemed like with each passing century, Mary became more removed from the rawness of childbirth in a stable, more removed from the messiness of humanity, more removed from us. As conversation of her virginity predominated, her humanity diminished.

But what if Mary’s humanity is actually paramount to understanding the good news of Jesus.

I’m going to go too far in my midrash here, but I can’t help but wonder, what if Mary and Joseph didn’t have sex prior to marriage. What if Mary became pregnant, not by divine conception, not by Joseph, but by someone else. Should the thought astound you, just for a minute consider the prevalence of sexual violence in our society today. One out of every six American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime.[1] One out of every six. That statistic should make you cry. And there is no reason to believe women weren’t taken advantage of in Biblical times either. Read Judges 19 for a story of a woman who lived over 3000 years ago that will break your heart still today.

So, what if Mary, a young woman who lived in Nazareth, didn’t have consensual sex prior to marriage, but instead was raped? What if she became pregnant, not by her own agency, but in a violent transgression of her humanity? What if Jesus’ conception wasn’t divine, but instead a product of horrifying sin?

What would it mean for Emmanuel, God-with-us, to be firmly planted within those who find themselves victims of such abuse? What would it mean for Love to Come Down and lift up those who find themselves not only physically hurt, but also socially shunned for the presumptions laid upon their growing bellies and un-wed bodies? What would it mean that “just when Joseph had resolved [to dismiss her quietly], an angel of the Lord appeared to him and said, Joseph, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife. She will bear a son, and you will adopt him and name him Jesus.” What would it mean if Mary’s plea to the angel, “How can this be, since I am a virgin?” was her cry for help, to which the angel responded mercifully, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be holy; he will be called Son of God.”

 Maybe the scandal of Christmas is that even at our most broken, God’s love reigns. Maybe the miracle of love is that Joseph believed Mary and his faithfulness brought her some healing. Maybe the gift of Jesus is that God intimately knows the incapacitating hurt we carry, so much so that God came to a woman in her raw vulnerability and proclaimed in that moment that she would carry Emmanuel, God-with-us, to bring redemption for her and for all of creation.  

 Praise be to God who knows our brokenness and brings healing. Praise be to God whose compassion knows no boundaries. Amen.

[1] Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network. (2021, December 7). Victims of Sexual Violence: Statistics. https://www.rainn.org/statistics/victims-sexual-violence.