"Train up a child in the way he should go; Even when he is old, he will not depart from it." - Proverbs 22:6
“AJ" was a sixth-grader. He had already failed two grades. He was in the school’s gifted program. Go figure. Truth be told, AJ really was intelligent ... he just didn’t apply himself very well. At all. Let’s be honest. For many years, I led a large group of volunteer mentors/tutors through a program called SNAPP - Students Needing A Pat and a Push in an under-resourced school district. AJ needed a Push! A big push!
I love mentoring students that are deemed "at-risk” - at risk of being left behind; at risk of dropping out of school. I also enjoy tutoring any student in math or science. But, I have many rules! I don’t give out personal information, except to parents. If I tutor, I only meet in public places, usually Starbucks. If I mentor in a school, it’s in a very visible space. I prefer fist-bumps to hugs; if a young student wants to give me a hug, I’ll engage, but only side-by-side. I’m careful. Today, you have to be. It all sounds easy enough, right? What could possibly go wrong?
I struggled to make a connection with AJ in school. He was disruptive in class. He was a breath away from being sent to an alternative school. He didn’t need tutoring help; he could do the work if he chose to do so. But outside of sports, he had few interests. I worked an entire year with him, and felt I was missing the mark. I stayed with him and, the next Fall I decided, perhaps against my better judgment, to try a field trip together. I had tickets to an upcoming Houston Texans football game. I told AJ I’d like to take him to the game, but I needed to speak to his mother. The next time I saw him, he said, “Mom said I can go, but she can’t meet you.” Great.
I told AJ that I would meet him that Sunday at McDonalds, near his neighborhood. I didn’t want to go to his large apartment complex. The ethnically diverse neighborhood was named Greenspoint, though it was nicknamed Gunspoint. I thought McDonalds was a reasonably safe place and that his mother could meet me there and convince me it was OK for AJ to be with me for the day. I only half-expected them to show up. What parent in their right mind brings their child to go to a game, all day, with someone they’ve never met? Since I didn’t want to be the one to disappoint him, I arrived at McDonalds as promised, thinking it would likely be a lonely Sunday breakfast for me. Then, from around the corner, here came AJ, all decked out in a clean, seemingly new, Texans jersey. He was grinning from ear-to-ear. Yet, no parent emerged. I bought him breakfast, wondering what I would or should do next. A lanky man, in a white T-shirt and tattooed from head to toe, entered the restaurant. He looked around and then looked directly at me. He smiled and pointed at me ... his fingers in the shape of a gun. And then he left. AJ must have sensed my unease. He told me, “That’s my dad’s friend - he’s being funny; he was sent here to make sure I was with who I said I’d be with.” As Dana Carvey would say, "Well, isn’t that special?!" Approval granted. I think.
I was all in now, and we left for the game. Outside the stadium, we did all the pregame activities for kids. We then moved inside for the game. One of AJ’s teachers was a cheerleader for the Texans; we had fun with the binoculars! We laughed, we talked, we ate, the Texans won; it was a great day! I was now connected, just as I had hoped when first conceiving the idea. I could tell that AJ had the time of his life. We left the stadium and, on the way back, an hour's drive, AJ borrowed my phone every few minutes. He tried to reach his mom to tell her of his exciting day and to plan for a drop-off place. His mother never answered and she never called back. Now what was I to do? She seemed so disconnected as a parent. AJ was disappointed but not scared. My sense was, he was used to it. And so, with darkness falling, I entered the apartment complex where AJ lived ... a middle-aged, balding white guy, driving a Lexus, with a young boy as his co-pilot. Great. We went to his apartment; no one home. No surprise. I began combing the streets trying to find someone whom I felt comfortable with so as to leave the boy in safe hands. AJ guided me and we knocked on a few doors before finding a family who knew him and who indicated they would care for him until his mother’s return. Mission accomplished. Thank God!
This is a long story and one that still keeps me up at night. I still think about AJ. In what ways was he being "trained" by his parent(s)? What lessons were being learned? What does his future look like with such training and lessons? I valued our time together over those 18 months. I hope I gave him things to think about. I hope I gave him encouragement. Was he now "trained in the way he should go”? I can’t imagine it. Were our occasional visits and conversations enough that he might stay in school? I’ll never know; he moved after that semester with no notice and no forwarding address. Kids like AJ, and the situations they find themselves in, are the reason I enjoy working with at-risk youth. I grew up on the poor side of the street. Though I came from a loving home, I try to relate situations in my past with their own. I want them to know anything is possible. And, in subtle ways, I let them know from where that help comes. With kindness, stability, engagement, time and trust, maybe I can make a small difference.
That’s what our Fall Mission Outreach is all about - making a small difference with kids that need us!
This coming school year, we don’t know whether students will be taught at school, at home or both. We know the current plan; but that could change. We also know that at-risk kids need our help regardless of the school scenario. We know that these students need to see people with positive intentions. They need to see a positive light. We can be that light! With our Fall Mission, we have the opportunity to help nearly 55 different students….from preschool all the way through college! We have the opportunity to make a small difference in their lives. We can help move their lives forward. They will respond to kindness. You’ve perhaps seen my video about our Mission. You’ve perhaps seen the email from the Church regarding the details (see below for a repeat of the links).
It’s different this year given we’re not in a church building. It would be easy not to engage, and signups have been slow thus far. These kids need us. And that need is urgent. We have ways to participate that will fit any budget! I hope you’ll join me! Thank you in advance for your generous participation! Together, let us take a small step to help train and teach the children!
Heavenly Father, the world needs more of you! Bless and protect our teachers as they are called to enter schools and as they continue to develop new ways to teach the children. Bless parents who are finding new and positive ways to educate their children from home. Watch over students without parents or without parents who care. Give them a thirst for knowledge so that they might learn. Guide our hearts and help us reach these at-risk youth in our midst. Watch over AJ. In your loving Son’s name, the ultimate Teacher, Amen.
“And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down and when you rise.” - Deuteronomy 6:6-7
Sponsor A Child Via SignUp Genius (you’ll receive your child’s specifics in a couple days): Click here
Participate In Our Amazon Wish List (the socks, undies and tennis shoe drive): Click here
Donate Online (we’ll shop for you): Click here
View The Fall Mission Outreach Video: Click here
Rick Meidel, his wife Natalie and daughter Sarah have attended St. John UMC since 2018. Rick can be reached at meidy@me.com or 832-418-9200.